Prop. 8: the musical

I don't do much of "video only post" but here is one quite funny:

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

and Jack Black is so sexy as Jesus..!

Back from holydays

The trip was great*, incredible foggy landscape:

But since my come back i'm drowned in work...

*: no real cuties seen but some potential, too bad.

Holydays

It's becoming cold ( less than 20°), the sky is grey, it might rain any day... it's the perfect time for a motobike trip! 

I'm going north with some friends for a week...i'll bring back some photos... will there be any cuties?

action man & flood photos

I promised more photos of the flooding of Hanoi, here it comes... right after Mr President:

Transportation in the rain

Motobike?

not a good idea

Car? seems better but you risk more money...

Traditional? The safest one?

Consequences

If you are lucky: just dry and change the oil of your motorbike

i just did that ^_^

More serious situation for underground park

Oh shiiiiiiiiiit situation

People can get very wily

For more you can check:

• VnExpress
• VnExpress
• A flash slideshow

Don't trust' em

Last friday was the birthday of a colleague, we had to celebrate that... let's go to bia hoi!

Conveniently, our boss were not there and the idea to go to some bath & massage place in the countryside popped quickly during lunch. Although, it was raining and the decision was made to go to a classic massage, tam quat, nearby.

When i say classic, i mean in the vietnamese way:

Traditional medicinal vietnamese massage

As you can see it's very tradtionnal but if you prefer boyz it may be possible, samson example (not kinky at all...unfortunately :p).

Actually, i really disliked that because it was obvious it was a place for happy ending as the masseuse acting quite frankly (seating on me in a very direct way, touching everywhere, etc). I was also displeased by colleagues thinking i would enjoy that but... actually they were not surprised i disliked that.I forgot, the masseuse was a girl and not pretty :p.

Conclusion

Vietnamese birthday coworkers parties suck: bad food, (bad) beer, bad massage.

Note

i'm thinking more and more prostitution, maybe "soft" like this or not, is so common in Vietnam because:

• You see many massage/haircut/tam quat/karaoke om (om means to hold someone like you do as a passenger on a mototaxi: "xe om") places with pink light, frosted glass and opened very late
• You can see them everywhere (countryside, city center, surbubs, etc)
• A colleague had his first time there and was ready to bring there too
• Another colleague go there from now and then
• I even experienced proposition for this kind of service in a traditional medecine institute which seems perfectly ok before

Mandatory post

Obama wins... should we have some :

?

... I mean in general for the lgbt community only

As would say SF about:

he looks really "officialy not gay“.

Flood survivor

No school today

A quick post about Hanoi floods: our house survived though we were stuck in the neighbourhood for two days. We went to the supermarket as we were out of food on saturday afternoon... we had water up to the half of the high (and we avoided several deeper area).

Though it was quite an athmospher in the street at that time, people finishingin the lake, walking around to see how is it outside or just drying their motorbike by all means (dish towel, hairdryer, mini "flame thrower"... this one is to dry and clean spark plugs), it was not the case for everyone. I saw pictures of underground car park with car covered of mud and probably totally broken. Moreover i heard that around 20 people died in Hanoi only.

I guess it was safer to stay all the week end home.

The famous submarine mode (with the optionnal ultimate umbrella)

i'll post some more (stolen) photos later.

Dry season ?

Normally it's the rainy season in Ha Noi since a month but as you can see on the picture it's still possible to have huge amount of rain. Hopefully, i have a submarine mode on my motobike (full power & prayer).

Trust 'em

As you may have guess...i'm picky boy and especially about food then i don't often go to eat "com sinh vien", student's rice. Last week, a bit crazy i accepted to go with some colleagues there, actually for a "bun cha" (a 'soup' with grilled pork and 'bun' noodles).

An appetizing bun cha: noodle, pork 'soup' & 'salad'

Despite a cockroach welcomed us, it was really good and really cheap (1$, but quite small) and i even didn't get sick after that!

Often my housemate told me it's safer to eat in the street or buy at markets than going to some supposedly good restaurants. I might tend to try it more often but it's not that easy. Most of the street restaurant have only one dish and... i dislike most of the dishes ><>

After the meal, we went to "ca fe" as usual. I was facing the inside while my colleagues were having some greedy stares at some foreigner girls outside. For some reason they said "2000" or "1000" and i asked why. The answer is : "in Vietnam you can buy handful of Xoi (sticky rice) of different size... '1000'  is small while '5000' is the biggest one" and they added " but you have to take care of the importance of the sheets"... 99% of the time, young vietnamese girls give "some" help to their breast.

Finally, we went for some serious foot massage... altogether in a room so no possibility of bonus ;). It was a really nice and cheap place; the masseuses were laughing all the time with my colleagues (50% of the time was about me...).

Conclusion: even though you are very picky and relunctant like me you have to trust your local colleagues/friends to try new (possibly disgusting) things!

... next entry might be "Don't trust 'em". ;-)

MSM Hanoi

A while ago i found a document called "MSM in Hanoi" and forgot about it but finally i read it (the doc can be found at unaids or some refs): it has not many useful or interesting information but some confirmations.

Men holding hands at a prevention meeting*

For the common people there is no gay people in Vietnam (or just the north? ^_^ ) or at least people never talk or think about that. The first point we see/feel is that there is no harassment on the plu community.

For example, whenever i go out with my bf we try to avoid places where he may meet friends but as long as we keep quiet no one would ever think of us as a couple. An even better example is a vietnamese girl friend of mine: she saw me many times with my bf and many times we left the party together and she still thinks we are both singles. In addition, she's been studying abroad for sometimes and probably know about plu.

The big disadvantage is about STD, particularly AIDS. It may be unknown but AIDS is spreading quite fast in Vietnam, at least in the north, and i'm sure of it as a friend was working on the subject last year. Thus AIDS prevention is developing, finally!, but only towards female sex workers... not for MSM or young people "being young“ or people having affairs etc.

As i usually say, Vietnam is moving very fast and i guess that this is very likely to evolve in less than 10 years, would it be early enough? No idea... It's so complicated to get any opinion about heomosexuality from my vietnamese friends or common people...

*: i stole (sorry 'bout that) the photo from a photographer blog. In contrary to what i say he took part in a project about MSM and aids prevention, his post about it is very very interesting and has some strong photos.

Classic situation

... I guess.

Friday night, it's party time with acquaintances and friends, while the latter know for me the former don't. No problem, the alcohol and the beat are flowing and two girl friends start to play with me.... dancing sensualy with me, opening my shirt then offering me drink by putting notes there (not down there!).

Great, great night! Although, a visiting friend of one of the girl doesn't seem to enjoy so much (coming from euro capital nights to Hanoi "evening parties" is not so hot).

The real good invited dj (Affecta)...compared to the resident one

The next day, i have plan for dinner with people like us, friends of my bf. The girl (C) sends me many sms to come to massage with her and her friend (D) then for dinner, then for party many times. I finish by answering "sorry i got a private life too" (more politely). Then i receive a sms from D like "let's get a drink without girls"... I check with C if i should understand correctly which she confirms but she cannot say much as she is with D and some friends.

As a kind  hearted person i make the two groups meet for some drinks at a normal place but it's getting late and just me, my bf, C and D go somewhere else to have a last drink and then get home.

And here comes the fun part:

I receive an sms like "sorry i didn't know the whole story about you, sorry for sending these message before".... OMG! He was interested in me!!!

That's a first time for me! I mean a westerner looking at me. Well, i learnt a few things:

• I am really innocent
• I am not that bad ??
• It's funny to piss girls (C wanted to get D for a few years now and because/thanks to me she knows she can't.)
• When i let my crazyness shines on the dancefloor some may like it \o/.
• Girls can get very bitchy when they know it's safe to play with a boy :D

Be right back

I finish my bear and i come back ;)

(damn work....)

Water sport

or being prepared to live in Ha Noi, the city of 1000 lakes.

(Sorry for such a bad title ^_^)

Well, Ha noi has not anymore 1000 lakes but there are still plenty of lakes. For example, there are 3 lakes near my home.

Thus Hanoi is a water city which means that when the rainy season comes, comes the problems (well now the season just ended, woohoo!).

By problems i mean:

• If you have a non-pro appointment and it's even slightly raining don't ever hope the person to come (90% of the time from my experience so far).
• Learn how to drive under heavy rain with a neat "raincoat', which often means putting your foot in the middle of the motobike to avoid "splashs" from cars and other people.
• Learn the submarine mode! It's a special mode of the vietnamese motobike but hard to get.  Sometimes, you'll need to drive right in the middle of water with a depth higher than your gaz exauster. The only way to succeed is to take a run up, go max power and pray!

What happens if you fail...push your motobike in the dirty water...

Nevertheless there are a few reasons to like the rain:

• The city gets quiet (almost)
• The temperature falls down greatly (and yes rainy season is also hot)
• I love the rain

The end is near!

It's getting more and more difficult to find lubricant in Ha Noi. Before i could go to Vincom, then i had to go to some westerner shops, now i have to go to the pharmacy and explain it in vietnamese! I will soon need to go to some dedicated shop like condomviet.

Maybe i should let my dear bf do that? ;)

Sniff me!

On friday evening i and a (female) colleague were invited at my boss' house to say hi to his baby (less than 2 months old)... and...

Incredible: 

• I hold her (the baby not the colleague!), that was a first time for me
  
• She was deeply fascinated by my face
• She cried when it was time for me to go!

Anyway, that's a bit too bloggish for an anonymous blog. The interesting point is that my colleague sniffed several times the baby... If you are a reader of rqd you already know that thay boy sniff often instead of kissing.

Thus i wonder if vietnamese people do that too? From my experiences... never but i have some explanations. First, it could be for babies only. Indeed, when my bf kiss me he often jokes about doing "viet-kiss" (closed lips kiss... or smack i call that). Second, gays might be naughtier and dare to do the frecnh kiss (not all the time ^_^ ). Finally, i may smell really bad even after a shower >.< 

Still... it's so cuuuuuuute!

Final question: i wonder if gay people do that in thailand or is it the norm for every couple?

answer is no :

Wow - what an effect!

Photography

Usually i am very scathing with vietnam but i'm the type who criticizes what/who i like (and just don't bother with the rest).

Today is different because i found a vietnamese photographer whom i really like: Vamp. I don't think he's professionnal yet but he is definitely close to have the skills already.

An example, i really appreciate:

which is my desktop picture at the moment. The only problem of vamps is his habit to over-photoshop them or he has crazy skills taking photographies! :p

He has a lot of different styles of photographies: touristic photos like this one, the one i'm jealous of, one not shirtless boy (and not cute >.<) and an improbable gay couple... Just go check his collections.

In the future you may get some more images like this one (which is not from vamp):

(naaaaaaah this blog will not turn into shirtless boyz blog style 0:) )

(and yes this guy is vinameat :p)

Hook up online?

To meet guys there are a few places in Hanoi (bars, park, etc) as i previously wrote. The other alternative is on the web.

I found one main website to hook up online: gaydar  though gay.com (i tried...not so many guys) or gayromeo (never tried) but also vietsingle. I'm quite surprised by the last one as it is a "local only" dating site and it's operated locally. 

In contrary to what i know from field (bar) there are some lesbians too! Although after a quick check there is none from Ha Noi and most of them are from Saigon... what a shame for Ha noi! :p

Anyway, this post is just a little introduction for another one coming much later... :p

Comments ... FREE!

Woohoo!

I just had a few (2 actually) comments on this blog and i'm really happy to know that i may have readears, thanks!

I just realize  that comments were not opened to every one (blogger/openID only) so that was a bit  like:

Now it's opened to anyone !!! I hope i won't have to use my super moderator:

If you have any simple way to deal with spammed comment i would be happy to know and install it before it comes here.

ps: yes i'm another stupid fan of lolcats... "Sorry, me no has shirtless boyz collection".

Rainbow flag

Did you know ...

what symbolyze the rainbow flag apart the "gay community"?

At  first i thought it was many "sexualities" exist and are equals (and so say wikipedia).

That's untrue, each color has a different meaning:

• pink means sex
• red means life
• orange means health
• yellow means the sun
• turquoise means arts
• indigo means harmony
• purple means spirit

Although, the current flag has only 6 colors (check wikipedia for the story).

A little more about colors

We all know that pink is often associated with being gay, because of the pink triangle for the na..zi, though it's quite incorrect now, especially asia. Indeed, according to gayboythailand (sorry i forget where it is) the asian color for gay "show off" seems to be purple (i'm gonna enquire about it with my bf but i think there is no semi-official gay sign). 

A bit more information about the rainbow flag, here, an abstract:

The first Rainbow Flag was designed in 1978 by Gilbert Baker, a San Francisco artist, who created the flag in response to a local activist's call for the need of a community symbol. (This was before the pink triangle was popularly used as a symbol of pride.) Using the five-striped "Flag of the Race" as his inspiration, Baker designed a flag with eight stripes: pink, red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, and violet. According to Baker, those colors represented, respectively: sexuality, life, healing, sun, nature, art, harmony, and spirit. Baker dyed and sewed the material for the first flag himself - in the true spirit of Betsy Ross. 

Coming out status

I had two purpose with this blog:

1. An outlet: at the very beginning i wanted to make a personnal diary to express all the things i could not.
2. Share my (gay) life in Hanoi: later on, the first purpose was quite left aside and i wanted to talke how it is to be gay in such a city.

Recently, i have talked only about number 2 but today is number 1...mostly.

I am officialy-to-myself gay since around june 2007 while i met my bf in late July (yeah we both forget the exact date -_-). Actually it is thanks to a housemate: she told me "it's weird, usually, i don't get along with boys like these appart gays" and then i told her (and myself) that i may have some questioning on the subject. 

After being with my bf, quickly all the housemates have been told about it. The last one, a boy, could not understand what i said and though for a few days it was joke but then he understood. It was no problem COs as we were young westerners “opened to the world".

A bit later on, a new housemate arrived, a very posh and not very resourceful guy. I knew, it would be a problem but we were not getting along so we didn't met so often. Althoug, once we've  been at the nightclub at the same time, quite drunk, and he told me: 

"i have something to tell you..." (why we don't get along etc) 

so i answered him 

"Nice, me too i have something to tell you, i prefer boyz and i know you can't take it". 

His answer is memorable:

"No, You, you don't take that" (like to take drugs), 5 times in a row!

That is the worse reaction to my CO so far though i had no pressure for this one.

Later on (last winter), i finally decided to tell my best friend about it. I did it using skype late at night, it was not easy to say the words without seeing the person but finally it came out. His reaction was "ah ok" which is quite ok ;) but what suprised me is that he already had a MSM experience and it was his first time but it was not his type... I asked him not to tell our shared friends as i was not ready yet.

A bit before summer, a friend came to Vietnam and i decided to tell him though i knew if i tell him, most of my friends will be informed. After many tries, i finally succeed to say:

 "ok wanna have a drink after dinner" 

- "no i'm tired"

- "you are sure?"

- "yes i'm really exausted"

5min later

- " well i want to take a drink because i have something to tell you"

This time it was difficult because he was in front of me but finally i succeeded and he had the  "ah ok" reaction. After that he met my bf and we chatted a bit. He stayed one more week in Vietnam so i had this time to prepare my friends back home.

As often, i was lazy and i call just 2 before his coming back and the rest after that. All of them were surprised, but had the "ah ok" reaction, but not shocked and wished me"be happy together".

The final CO was eventually to my family. That was the most difficult and still going on...but may evolve toward a good end.

Today, i got the idea that it may be the time for me to start my COs with vietnamese people. Shortly, there are two (maybe 3) categories of vietnamese i know who i may do a CO.

Colleagues

When i say "colleagues" it is only the young ones that may be able not to kick me right away. I tried to do a few jokes like "well i'm not very good at getting a girlfriend so maybe i show go for boyfriend?", their answers were a big minute long silence. Although, i think the women may take it quite ok while i think the men will take it quite bad.

Friends

I don't have so much friends that are not my colleagues but they are more open minded people (in my opinion). Actually, according to my dear friend N., one of them, a girl, may have guessed already...too bad she's one of the few i'd like to try again *** with 0:-)

Why doing a coming out to vietnamese?

The first reason is that there is a lot of gossip about me (like anyone else though especially singles) and one includes a former "affair" (i use to try to date) with a girl. It's some time i don't think about her (Hey i've been with my BF more than 1 year now) but some people still think i'm depsaired about her.

Another reason is that i would like to be free to say "yeah i'm not single anymore" and "sure, i'll come with bf"...sweet but impossible i think.

The last reason is that it would such a great pleasure to make them understand "you liked me but i was sucking dicks...so what do you think now? Will you fuck up your mind thinking i was a just an asshole since the beginning or try to accept it?" ... that would be nice!

It's more likely not to happen anytime soon but stay tuned!

Backlash

I didn't play so much with boyz when i was single though once i met a specific guy. This guy was starving for sex and why especially? Because he's married! Yes, it's pretty common here, notably for more than 30 years old gay (i think).

Actually, i didn't really want to meet him but unfortunately he studied in my home country, speaks my mother tongue and guessed easily from a few hints where i work. Thus i agreed to meet.

He was not the kind of boy i like  (sissy but nasty)  but i was starving too... Plus he was back in Vietnam since 6 months and it seems he had no man since that and.... "oi troi oi".

Finally, i decided not to ever see him again (Hanoi is not full of boyz but there are more than a few :p).

What happend today?

As everyday, i was iddling reading some websites when 2 guests arrived! This guy and a friend!

 My colleague introduced them to me. The guy is a friend of the other one and has no reason to be here beside that (officially... unofficially i guess it's for me or to see some neat westerners :p). I think i blushed a little at first but then i played it cool, even some chit-chat with him.

Actually, since the day i met him i was afraid of him to come to my work but then nothing happened. I just wonder if he'll try to contact me again (IM, dating website, phone, ...)?

Condom in Vietnam

Unlike Thailand, with its 7-11, it's not easy to find (good) condoms in Vietnam (Hanoi).

When i arrived and i started to need some i luckily found some western (durex) quality checked condoms in the Vincom maul as long as lubricant. Unfortunately, the stock was out in a few weeks.

Often supermarkets have some big arrival of western stuff

 then nothing anymore, i guess it's some discarded stuff.

Though, i am a bad foreigner who likes to have some westerner delicacies once in a while (a bit more often indeed), i know some westerner oriented shops and there i found the precious stuff to have safely some local delicacies ;). Thus i advise you to go to so

me westerner oriented shop or grocery they are much likely to have western quality condoms. 

The other place, i  have yet to check, is condomviet which has a website with a bit of english. While searching again for this website in order to do this post, i happen to find this: sexshopviet. Unfortunately it seems to be only in HCMC not in Hanoi... 

By the way i tried Vietnamese condoms called

 "Romantic".... it's a bit rough/thick, that is why i thought this issue deserve a post here.

Konheo

Con Heo means (the) pig in Vietnamese but it's not its sole meaning. In slang it designates also the porn stuff.  Why do i talk about that? because of this : konheo.com. 

It's a vietnamese design t-shirt shop. They make a lot of playwords in vietnamese (that i don't understand)  and they have some cute (straight) couple's t-shirts:

Ok they are not really good to do sexy photo yet but they are working on it ;)

Bangkok dangerous

I am a bit shameful using such a title...though it was that but not where i though!
 Here's the tale of 2 gays and 5 straight (beginners) in a 3 days week-end in Sin city.

Day 1: Table tennis
Bangkok resident and connoisseurs may know what i mean but to say it's straight it's: Ping Pong Show!
I had a quite good idea of what is it before actually see it thus i was not really motivated to go there but my male (straight) teammates were beginners to Bangkok and so wanted to see its dark side. I think a good ol' gogo bar would have been enough for them but they didn't know that.

So, we followed a Bangkok friend (farang) of mine to the (in)famous... Patpong who was following a tout who caught us on our way. A., my friend, went in to check the "quality" (i.e. swindle or not) and said everything was ok.

On stage, there were a few girls hanging between poles and some ladyboyz, the most 'beautiful' (and not only for me). Actually, girls were pretty ugly and quite fat (thai standards) but had some special abilities:

• Ping pong ball cannon

They put lubricated  balls in their pussy and shoot it at you, your job is to kick it back in a bucket using a racket. Side effects: you may get some lubricant (water only i think) or get the ball in your face.

• Bottle opening

You know the classic soda water you can buy in Thailand (to go along your sang som)...these girls can open it (tearable cap) with their pussy. Side effect: you might get wet (some of my friends were).

• Razor blade dispenser

They are able to have chained razors in their pussy... i let you find out how (read 'butterfly' if you cannot find...though it's not really interesting litterature). Side effect: impressive on newbies.

• Dart cannon

Same same ping pong balls  plus they aim at balloons, accuracy cas less 30%. Side effect: the most funny one?

Every good moment has an end and it was time to go...'check bill': 5400 bahts for 7 people, including entry fee + drink + girls drink + show. Eventually, when my friend went in for a quick check he asked for this kind of scam, no show or entry fee they said, and when in he paid a few drinks for the girls to be a nice customer...and still they try to scam us. I have to agree we looked like good stupid tourists but unfortunately my friend speaks thai and i know how to behave in this kind of situation: stay calm (while my beginners were getting fed up).

Actually, my sissy beginners were uncomfortable after 15min when girls came to them and started to tease them (how innocent isn't it?) so my friend asked the bill but it took him 15min of thai talking to reduce the bills to less than 2000bahts  (still expensive) while my friends got nervous... like the other customers.

They had the same kind of scam but were real beginners and got nervous....instantaneously big guys came in the room and made them more "relaxed". They got out right after us and were very fed up about the price (though one guy was really into this kind of show...). 

Some advices going there: ask if there is any entry/show fee, pay a drink or two to girls, stay calm and don't hesitate to talk without any nervosity... if you are being scammed for real you may try to call the tourist police (they always have a car near patpong), if you can it will sort things out but big guys may prevent you to do so and ... ;)

Day 2: Issan 'disco'

After a nice dinner on a terrasse next to Chao Praya river, i brought my dear newbies to some real thai live show: Issan cultural center (maybe the name in english). It was also the time to take a tuk tuk... just 5 people. Unfortunately, the driver understood "Issan mansion" so we had to ask our way in the street and a very gentle (but maybe a bit drunk) guy led us there (more than 5min walk, big thanks!).

We were among the first customers and dressed quite too well for that kind of place but i felt ok as i know the place.

It took around 1h for the place to get packed and so we had the traditionnal opening of the big show: national anthem.

After that it was usual stuff (for me). A mix of song and jokes. Usually i don't answer jokes as it is in thai and it's spoken only but this time it was played too. It was a (fake) ladyboy  interpreting the traditional fishing dance. Instead and detting fish in his net he attracted fish with his pussy. Unfortunately it seems he was unlucky...so he finished the job using a cucumber.  it may seems not smart but was very fun and especially while he was teasing the lead singer while he introduced the next show. Afterwards we moved to the hype disco: santhika...live music but very so so for me.

Day 3: Gogo boyz

My first time in the sinfulDuangthawee Plaza.

Quite close to the infamous Patpong there are 2 or 3 gay Soi. I knew the Silom Soi 4 with its Balcony and Telephone pub but i never dare to get a drink there, i just been to the Tapas disco (not gay oriented one). I knew also the Silom soi 2 with the famous DjStation though i never dared to go into the Soi. Finally that was the good day to get in!

I went there with my bf only. We took BTS and walked through thaniya plaza (i think), the japanese version of patpong.Contrary to patpong, the grils are dressed, out of the bars and nobody talked to me. I had a few smiles from the girls when they understood i was with a bf. Although, most of the time people thought my bf is a money boy and thai thus they speak first in thai to him: funny for me.

We had an ok dinner at Dick's cafe (i took a giant hamburger and my mouth was not big enough...) in company of a fewold  farangs some with (much) younger bf. After the dinner, i finally asked the manager where to go for a good show, he told me about the DreamBoy which a show 1h later. 

That left us some times to have a look around and try another first bar. We went to the Siam Angel Boy as they conveniently opened a bit the door for boyz to eye catch while i was having dinner... kinky :p

No entry fee nor show fee here, just expensive drinks (200bahts whatever you drink). Most of the time boyz stay on stage standing in underwear only (though including their mobile phone sometimes), sometimes they move a bit, talk a bit and that's all... so so though they are quite sexy.

Show Time

That was our first show ever... not so bad. Loud music (starwars style) while the stage curtains reveal two boyz. They start "showering" using a water bottle, erotic :p, then one is giving some pleasure to the other one... I was quite surprise because from the beginning of the show they have a hard one (it slips out) and have a condom on (safety first!) but i think they use some trick or drug (viagra?) to do so. The second part of the show was a boy having a shower in a cabin on the opposite wall of us.

After that we went to the second bar: same kind of place but much bigger, sexier boyz and more different boyz style.

In contrary the show was a real one here. It started with many boyz dancing (with some piece of clothes) on a song in the style of the Chicago musicals. They were really good dancers! The second part was: a simili SM action, 2 boyz taking pleasure from a third one, throwing him away (even on a ladder) and use some soft rubber thingy to lash him: definetly not my thing. Eventually the three had the hard on with condom...

Next was a girl (the only one apart from one in the audience) presenting some nice boyz and their thing, she always played with it and even kissed it sometimes... Then a few boyz parade with fur clothes as girls but not even ladyboy style. The bald with a small beard guy had the most applaused, really funny part.

The final was two boyz (one as a girl) imitating Carrabao (most famous thai band) but the man got shot down (bang bang) "HEEEEEELP call the doctor" and here it comes with 2 nurses. By all means they healed the shot guy, electrochoc, wc suction-cup, kiss of life, giant dildo. Everything was just for fun (no the 50x10cm dildo was not actually used!) and it was really really funny especially when nurses disputed to take advantage of the healed guy!

After such a funny show we moved on to DjStation. Nothing much to say apart that we arrived at the end of the life show (with a really fat guy vaguely disguised as a girl and he was so sissy it was funny) though some comment:

Plenty of boyz, some nice, not so many farangs but it was really cruising time, most of the people were not really dancing so we had to start the show ourselves. I was surprized as we were the only actually dancing and touching each other (not it a really kinky way :p). We were next to 2 big hunks and a fat colorful guy with huge 70's sunglasses, at least he was enjoying partying. 

That is all for this Bangkok report. Next time i will check for more places to go and especially more thai oriented one, after coming back home i found some nice listing that i will post here before my come back to Bangkok!

Last comment from my bf: all thais boyz look sissy! :-D

Iron woman

Funny picture though it's never said too often...

Karaoke

I'm back from Bangkok but i don't have enough time to write about it now. Instead just a funny anecdote at the karaoke.

It has been a long time for me and especially for my friend N. thus she decided to organize again (the 2 previous attempt were crashed thanks to rain mostly) a karaoke. We know a very nice karaoke, thanks to L. , which has a lot of english song and you can choose directly the music with the remote control (most of karaoke here need you to find songs in the list then give it to the "DJ"). Actually, this plus the athmosphere let me guess (this time only) that this place is also a whorehouse but who cares really?

Anyway, the funny part is that N., another housemate, went with us for his first karaoke in Vietnam and he sang YMCA which is great as sometimes he has some homophobic talking (and blogging...just when he is drunk). Unfortunately (for me) i didn't take any video of that!

Actually, i am quite surprise because he did that and he tried several times to take a romantic picture of me and my bf but has N. is a bit old school in photography he didn't manage to succeed with brand new all automatic camera...poor us. More surprising he will try again when he receives is good ol' camera bought on ebay... Stay tuned!

Back home

We did it!

I have to say that i ama very good tour guide that sux! All the places i brought my friend were much appreciated though almost everytime i did some mistake. I started by missing the BTS station, took several taxis with just the name of the place and eventualy the taxi say "yes yes i know" and finally they don't. Nevertheless we were quite lucky, especially when going to some 99% thai live show.

We were dropped of near an hotel with a similar name but by asking people in the street, one of them brought us to the correct place. After that they decided to go to a night club recommended by a friend of mine but i didn't know where (except thong lo district). The taxi said "yes yes" when asked if he knew the way. Unfortunately, after speeding and making my friends nervous in the car he told us that he does'nt the way but we asked again to a nice mototaxi the way and here we go... The rest of the adventures later...

Going west

Tomorrow i will fly to Bangkok. I won't be alone (this time) as i go with my boyfriend, first holyday together, and also a bunch of friends.

All of them are newbies to Bangkok thus i will have to be the tour guide... too bad i failed to contact the hotel. Well, i will do as usual, i will try the hotels i know, there will be free rooms for sure...somewhere.

As i don't go alone, especially concerning my bf, and i'm a bit more confident about gayness: i will go to the dark alleys full of PLU (people like us) as Silom Farang call us.

I'm sure to go to nice places like telephone or dick's cafe, i hope we'll dare to go to place like DJ-station and unprobably to some gay gogobars. It's not that we will want to do some i still consider quite immoral but as i did girls gogo sightseeing i am vry curious about boys ones! Evidently i will have to go to straight only places with my friends though i may be able them to tapas which is at the enter of a gay soi (if i remember correctly)... so maybe get them to there... would be fun to see that.

Actually, i already went to one these bars but it was an accident. I met a farang and a thai friends at the sala daeng bts and after enough we decided to get a drink and went straight into the nearest soi. 10 sec after seating the thai went red and after 1 min we guessed where we were ("voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir" song). Fortunately it was not even 6pm so it was still cool.

Have a nice week-end, i guess we will have one!

Ladyboy coming to Ha Noi?

I recently discovered this info on a straight, kinda homophobic (that's why i won't link him) blog. Despite some disagreements with him i have to admit that i share some of this comment. The decree is about malformation only but when was the last decree applied 100% correctly?

I have no idea but i think it was a long time ago. So, will Viet Nam became a new "ladyboy land"? I really doubt so, the culture is much less tolerant than Thailand but who knows? It can be a profitable business.

Indeed i think medical tourism is about to beginning here. A few months ago i decided to do lasik surgery for my crappy eyes. I did find easily a clinic to do so for 12m VND (a bit less 600€ at that time) for both eyes. Unfortunately they did had the latest machinery (it was second hand from 2005) and could not guarantee a perfect vision and so i decided to go Bangkok. Though in a few years (or less) they will have the money to have the latest machinery and come in the great medical business... i just hope their doctors are good enough...

Ha Noi massage

I was reading an article from a newspaper (of 2007) and it starts like this : 

Massages and spas are considered great ways to relax and improve physical as well as mental being. Hanoi is famous for its traditional massage streets in which the profession has been passed from generation to generation like Le Duan, Quan Thanh, or Cua Nam, not to mention excellent message centres at the Institute of Tradition Medicine, and the Institute of Acupuncture. At present, many massage shops are also popping up to meet an increasing public demand. 

Please, let me laugh!

As far as i know (which is not much i am aware of it) Ha Noi or Viet Nam as no big tradition of massage in contrary to thailand. Plus, i have to admit i have been to this "Institute of Tradition Medicine". The first time it was a boy and it was a normal very so-so massage. I went back there a few times even with female friends and every time the female massager offered "massage number one" (too bad the boy didn't).

The second part speaks the truth stating that almost every massage shop offers this "number one massage". Actually i'm a bit surprised as i know pinky and clumsy places are for that but i thought the decent place places like (big) hotels and high class massage had no "bonux" but it seems to be rare. I may be quite lucky to have found a nice place not too expensive (200.000vnd / hour) though i still miss thailand massage (maybe next time i should try their famous boy massage? 0:) )

edit: about boy massage, according to utopia forum it seems there are more than a few boyz massage but be warned: scam seems to happen very often! Anyway, remember one thing: it is not a gay-friendly country.

Coming out in Ha Noi

It seems comingout is possible in Vietnam finally. Though, don't be so happy about it  because you can stay alive but probably not socially!

Anyway, the subject of today is the coming out of 41 years man from Hanoi whom published a book of his story with journalists.

My source: NoodlePie 

The original AFP news

I talked a bit about with my bf before that and in his opinion it's absolutely not possible to come out to his family or friends... in fact he so impressed when i told him that finally i did my CO to my family by phone recently (and not much impresssions since that...). 

It's funny because i think i will be possible for him to stay officially single and pratically gay as long as he can cope with social pressure and not say anything about men. As soon as he would come out to his aquaintances he will be socially doom even if they had gessed/kenw it before.

"Asian ways" i guess.

Back?

Well, not yet.

I just wanted let my numerous fans know another (much nicer) gay blog in asia: gayboythailand which is obviously more funny. It may be due to the frequent sexy but not kinky pictures of sweet asian boyz... Enjoy!

edit: i forget a funny news... my sissy housemate is actually gay \o/ but dislikes me... "Damn qua"!

Break

You know what?

Gay bloggers have also a pro life!

Actually, my work situation is really shitty at the moment so i will take a break from this blog just for a few weeks i hope.

Indeed, i took too much brain-time to think about the boy vs girl issue. Now, i know a bit more, i would say, as i've been in a couple for some time already. Nevertheless, this question is not answered yet and i'll have to go back to it later.

Cya

Housemates

Incredible!

I share a house with a few housemates but since a few weeks, they are leaving and new ones are coming.

The first one to join is an english teacher who has travel around a lot, actually since his birth. Nothing more to say as he is almost a ghost, wake up late (yes later than me!) and work late. Ah yes, he's been to Thailand and has a "mai pen rai" tattoo, which means "doesn't matter" "live life like it comes" etc, as a big fan of thailand...sweet! On the CO front, i said nothing, maybe he ll know or not but as he is a ghost, it doesn't matte so much and in addition he seems not to care at all with who he is living with.

The third (second later :p) is arrving soon in the house, i just met him once for the moment. Kinda old compared to me and the rest of us (actually i am the youngest!). He has also travel around quite a lot. He seems very talkative and very easy to be "friend" with. Indeed, we (he) were talking about girls etc. and he asked me if i have someone:

me:"Yes"

him:"A vietnamese girl?"

"actually, let's say it straight it's a viet boy" (nb: next time "let's say it straight, i'm not...straight" :D)

=> CO done!

The second one* (or last one :p) is quite the opposite. He's not very talkative (at first), quite shy (he didn't want to tell us his age) and ... may be gay! Why i think that?

Once, i went to propose him to have dinner with me but he just welcomed a nice (boy)friend whom seems utterly gay. He s shy and quite sissy sometimes plus he does some sport to keep healthy and finally he is working on litterature as a professor.

So yeah i know, it doesn't prove anything but i have some kind of feeling he is gay...we will see!

*: i forgot, no CO done with him but i invited him to have a drink with me and my bf and he saw my bf at home on a sunday morning so he might get the idea by himself ;)

gay music

People often says that the "gay music" is a reality and say also often say that they usually set the trend for club. I don't know if it's true or not but recently i realised that i like gay music, is it another proof that i am one of them (in addition to my gayish motobike according to my bf X-( )?

First come, first serve: The rocky horror picture show

The movie itself is really funny and pretty nutty but i love the music because it is so bombastic in a way.

Queen

Maybe everything started from there. I remember when i was a secondary school kid i discovered this band (and his singer but i was naive ;)), it was so punchy and free from the standard i knew. A few months later i went, for a school trip, to Edimburgh and i found the T-shirt, woohoo \o/ so happy. Anyway, i grew up and i still like it though i know for freddy mercury. STOP, he was absolutely not my type :p but he was really a great person to be able to make fun of his sexuality (the famous picture of the band disguised as women) in such a conservative world.

Scissor sisters

I discovered it recently, it's so punchy, modern & kitsch and well shaped for gay. Actually they play too much the gay code i think. Anyway several songs are really nice.

Lucky Lucky twice

I don't know if it's really gay but i love this song since i am in vietnam \o/

nb: promise to do a much more interesting post next time though i have no comment so why? :p

Comical

Disclaimer: Yes i am such a bad boy though not much O.o

Once upon a time when i was young and credulous i met some guy from the dating website just to talk. Actually, i accepted to met him because he discovered quickly what i do and where i work (giving him just a few hints) and also one of his friend was about to work at my company. Anyway, we met, had a coffee, etc.

Today, my boss have lunch with this person, without knowing the guy is gay. Here comes the funny part: this guy is deeply in love... ahem... appetite of my boss but my boss does not like but (again) he accepts to have lunch with him to keep in touch with the friend of the gay guy, as this person has very qualifications for work and did not say yes or no for the job.

It would be funny that the non gay guy comes to work with us so i could tell him about his friend... though his friend would kill me because he is married (and obviously not enjoying it).

Women

... i hate you! :)

First, a few days ago, i did my coming out to my oldest expatriate friend here. She knew me and we talked about our desperate love (we were both bur differently in love with someone that was not, it was a girl for me :p) last year. I thought she would know me and maybe sees that now i am better but yet different. I hoped that she would have guessed that something was on but she didn't guess at all!

She was really surprised but not shocked. Actually she was shocked (in a way) by knowing who is my bf, she was astonished . Anyway she told me that she is happy because i won't get use by some vietnamese chicks.

Second, a colleague of mine told me i would make a perfect couple with one of my flatmate (girl ;)). She said so because i went with this flatmate to a wedding party and we were so nice together !

Although, the point is she asked me today if i am in love because i really look like it. It was not so easy to say no..hic hic! Consequently, i think she really has this way of sensing people and i am pretty sure she will continue to harrass me but for the moment i have the cover of my flatmate, what will it be after?

Finally i don't hate you girls ;) it's just some have this sense and some has not and in this case it's not the good one....

Sleeping with a vietnamese boy

Mwahahahah with this title i should have readers but unfortunately it's not what you think!

Just an anecdote:

I just ask my bf what are his plans for tonight and he answered:" nothing until 1.45 am". Evidently, i laughed but i asked anyway. Actually he's gonna watch the UEFA cup with his colleagues at work!!!

Vietnamese men and soccer.... can't be helped!

To be there

I have always been a lonely person in need of friends. It can seems contradictory but i think it is not. I need friends to appreciate loneliness, loneliness that i need to appreciate friends. It's funny during parties i really enjoy to set me appart and have a look at all those humans cheering all together (afraid of tomorrow?).

I could explain that by my feeling of being different though it took me around half a century to know how i am "different". It is not (only) my homosexuality, it's just a side-effect. I am just someone different, with different sight on the world, my mind full of daemons, my in(t/f)ernal daemons...

Anyway, i was really close to my mother before and only to her (yes i know, so stereotyped). With her death a some years ago, i started to be a little closer to my father but finally by moving away for studies then to go work abroad now i am quite far. At the same he is continuing to stay closer to me but i can't at the moment, i changed too much. My life changed, i'm a grown up (almost), i gain money from my work, i have friends they can't imagine, i have bf they have no idea... i manage my life and it is so different from they think.

Anyway (2), it is not the purpose of this note. Recently my father talk to me of my brother. He is in couple with a "so so girl" (to talk nice). I saw her more than a few times, she is quite cute, not mean but not interesting at all.

I know my brother, he may look like a good redneck sometimes but he is not. He started his own company and after 2 years it's going really good and he is well educated. I still remember one of his first serious girfriend. She was going to be lawyer. They were so perfect together...but they live to far from each other and were not able to live at the same place (big city vs countryside).

Finally, my father asked me to talk my brother but since 1 year i called him once and chatted with him less than 5 times. To call him to talk about his couple, to let him understand that finally he could break up. Yes because he said already it's not going well for them, he just got used to it and.... i think he is really afraid to be alone for a long time, it's not easy in deep country side!

So? I made (unconsciously) everything i could to be far from them and now i should be there for them? I don't even know if, when i ll come back, they will accept me as i am. Well, as you should know, i am a good boy and i will try to talk to him but he can be so stubborn.

...maybe it will be easier for me when i come back then....aaaaaah.... communication my family biggest flaw.

Sauna or not?

And when i speak about sauna i obviously speak about gay sauna!

Here's the fact:

I recently read on utopia, that there is a gay sauna in Hanoi! I even went there to check the surroundings of the place. It is located in a narrow and long alley, typically vietnamese. First it surprise me because you have the common life around. Second, it's quite discreet and really quiet, the front room is a moto parking (it was full last friday when i drove around there). It is also quite cheap (5$ i think).

(edit) address: Adam's Spa 92 Ngo (alley) Tho Quan, Pho (street) Kham Thien . They even have a website though i don't understand anything...

Will i go?

I think, i will go there... one day. 

• Why one day? 
  

I don't really to ask my bf to go there, i don't want him to see me as a pervert (that i may be one day :p).  When we talk he is someone who dislike the gay athmosphere (everyone knows everyone and had much "fun" with many / girly fashionned boyz etc). Finally, thanks to my confidante, i may ask him to go there with me. He and i would feel really uneasy there but it would be better for him to know that i go there and he is sure that i didn't do something bad there...

• Why going there?

I have some morbide curiosity about that kind of place, curiosity to know my "sexual comrades"! I really want to know if it is like i imagine (all that stereotypes) with people having fun anywhere or "just" a lustfull athmosphere!

Anyway i will keep my (so many) dear readers updated on that... but maybe i'll check another gay bar before (one of the nightlife places i told you before).

Videoing out

It's been one week my friend is back home. It's a little more than he knows for me. He was not my closest friend and he was not the easiest one to talk to but i finally succeeded to tell him. As thought, he was really surprised.

One evening after he comes and goes around i decided to tell him so we went for dinner together to the traditionnal bia hoi close to my home. It takes me many try to tell him. I was so unconfident i finally said "ok i want to get a sintho with you after, i have something to tell you" (he was tired and refused before i say that).

So here it is: 

- Me: "i have a big news for you as you are the first friend to visit me here: I am not single anymore"

- Him:"Great"

- "It's not a girl, it's a boy"

- "Ah, really?"

Although, as i was really serious, it didn't doubt so much. It's just i am his first friend to turn to be gay.

Here comes, the funny part: "Videoing out"

I wanted to tell my other friends before he tells them, so i decided to skype them one by one.

It went very smoothly, the first one, a girl whom i am quite close to, was surprise also but she was asbolutely ok as her aunt is a lesbian and she is totally ok with that.

The second one is my former flatmate, he was also damn surprise but doesn't care so much (was by phone... non geek people...).

The third is the flatmate of my visiting friend, he knew already (difficult to keep your mouth closed when you share an apartment). This friend went also abroad for a few years and he told that at the time he tries some things... like men, even a serious relationship and that finally it's not for him (he's thinking about wedding with his girlfriend). The interesting part with him is that his family (and his gf) is very christian but they know and it's bearable for them though i think they don't talk about it. It reassures me for when i will tell my family (which is not religious at all, lucky me :p).

The last friend, i called him at  his waking up time (noon) and just said "Ah" at first. Then he reassures me, we talked a lot, i gave him some details about my boyfriend, how it is to be gay in hanoi etc. As he is one of the few to know my family, we talked about coming out to them and reassures me about that... so i will tell them one day, next time i come back i guess.

To conclude, "videoing out" is a good idea when you are far and your friends are nice (though i wouldn't recommend it for potential problematic coming out, too easy to stop the talk). I am very proud of my friends, to have so good and open minded friends!

So i say to them (although they don't know this blog :p): Thank you!

Lucky lucky

I am crazy about this song but i really don't understand why?

• It's a good ol' 80's remixed song.
• You can hear it everywhere in bars... but not only, it's very common as a mobile ringtones!
• It's stupid lyrics
• Kinda shitty music (outside of dancing athmosphere ;))

So just enjoy it:

It's funny because i make my visiting friend listen to it. His reaction was: "you are definitely an expatriate now"... thank you ;)

Enjoy:

I just watch this video... isn't it a bit lesbianish? That would explain why i hear it often in the gay bar.. but would'nt explain i hear it also in common nightclub.

Bonux: A few days ago, i read that D&G is a gay couple... Vietnamese young people are crazy about that brand (among a lot of brands) but i think that would piss them off to know ;)

Gay night life in Hanoi*

It may surprise my fellow readers but i am not what you can call a expert of gay night life in Hanoi, nor in general :p, but i was an expert for night life before (when i was young and bald yet... joking...for a few years :( ).

Anyway, let's start with inescapable place :

• Solace (End of Chuong Duong Do):  a common night club with ok music to shitty one (depends on the dj and you) but it is a nice place as it a boat on the red river
• Lighthouse (formely barracuda) (51 Phuc Tan): the music seems to be a bit better and seems also to be less closed by police (you understand when you live here). this nightclub is located close to solace. I read some rumor it is/was gay friendly but i don't think so as it has a broad audience.
• Dragonfly (15 Hang Buom): one of the biggest "late" bar for expat. Several rooms with different athmosphere, the old staff is friendly.
• Tet bar  (formerly maquis) (2a Ta Hien): french crowded place so it has a different athmosphere compared to other bar.
• Funky monkey (31 Hang Thung): expensive and noisy place with a mix of trash-posh young vietnamese and tourists. You can forget it though i went there a few times with friends and had a few good times (taking all the dance place for us only)
• FM3 (2D Duong Thanh): same owner as the previous (but the number 3, the 1 is no more and the other is the 2 obviously). More expensive, more noisy (loud), damn cold, no space to dance and no westerners... some mafia with their money girls. Nice place! Anyway if it was a bit more friendly and with some space to dance it would be similar to the place à like in Bangkok.

Gay-friendly

• Mao's red lounge (7 Tạ Hiên): Oi gioi oi, it took me a few weeks to get in! I read on some website it is gay-friendly but actually when i get in, it was normal. Since then i read it is gay owned. Anyway the athmosphere is good (westerner only almost :/) but it's good ol' 80's 90's music!
• Apocalypse now (no adress): how not to mention it? Well it's down now but i heard it was a damn great place (i read a blog describing a gay kiss in front of everyone!!! Incredible here).. RIP with XXX (i will find the name again i promise :p)

Gay-oriented:

• GC bar (5a Bao Khanh Lane): i let you gues what GC stands for! Quiet place with a snooker and good music during the week... H.O.T. place on friday and especially saturday evening! Ultra crowded, nice modern shitty music :D. As you can imagine i like very much this place though it's a damn cruising bar...
• VTN (72 Nguyen Du): I read it's a gay place i saw nothing when i checked during the week... looks even a bit shitty though, GC is the same during the week.
• Connect cafe (So 8, Duong 2, Khu Tap The F361, An Duong, West lake ): i didn't check this one but i read it's like 'the place where to be'.
• Adam Sauna (92 Ngo Tho Quan, Pho Kham Thien): I am not ready yet to go there, i have a too bad idea of gay sauna...

Ressouces:

newhanoian.com: a general expat-in-hanoi webportal, damn useful!

utopia-asia.com: some info but not up  to date.

*: I know i am in contradiction with a previous post, let's say i am less paranoid.

Ban dang o day

(My friend is here)

He arrives a few days ago and stayed in Hanoi for 36 hours so i had no opportunity to talk to him, though we said a couple of words about "girflriends" and the girls in Vietnam (whom, i agree, can be really cute).

He will come back after a tour around the north and i still wonder if i will tell him. Previously on Battlestar Hanoi (yes i am crazy of BSG... and the season 4 is on air :D), i was really willing and very confident to tell him but i am not anymore, still the same question for me.

Well, if i find a good opportunity,not right before his departure, i will tell him. So, if it's ok he could meet my bf.

Upcoming in BSH: i will doing a little overview of (gay) night life in Hanoi.. it won't take me too long ;)

Coming out?

A friend of mine will visit me this week-end.  I won't see him for long but i'm seriously thinking of "coming out" to him.

But why?

• He is not my closest friend.
• I have almost no idea of how he will react.
• He may tell all my friends when he comes back even if i ask him not too (worst scenario).
• I don't feel that much ready.
• I don't come back soon to my home country.
• I don't want to lose friends (story of my life by relocating...) even the stupid ones who could think i'm not worth it anymore.... stupid, i know already...

Because

• He is the first one to visit me here
• The next one is my best friend, he knows already and the following would be much later.
• He will be able to say that i am still the same (abnormal guy but that's another story), though maybe happier.
• The question about my love life are coming more often by instant message.
• I want them to contact me again. As we say "far from the eye, far from the heart", as the times pass by, i don't have much contact with them.
• I want to be able to tell them everything.
• I want to be able to tell someone: "yesterday i did that with my bf, bla bla bla" and i'm far from being ready to tell my family.
• I feel like it (best reason actually), though you are never totally ready in my point of view?

The plan

We will have lunch together, if i feel ok i will talk about our friends love life and his especially. I guess he will ask for mine. I may  say "it's a bit complicated (which is true as everyone ;) )". Finally, i'll tell him i found someone nice and that is .... a boy.

If he's ok with that, i plan to go for a coffee with my BF.

Bonux: I finally know a vietnamese word (i like) to call my BF, it's "cung" like the japanese "kun" (for those who know).